Thoughts: Does it ever get better?

by | Nov 6, 2016 | Backstreet Boys, Feelings, Personal, Thoughts

20161107_004306000_iosI used to be depressed a lot. So much so, I contemplated a lot of bad things.  I’m not happy… in fact, I’m always sad and depressed. 

I’ve suffered from depression for the past twenty years. It all started in 1996 when my Granny died and just so many things that I built up and held back and hide and it made things worse.

And I’ve found happiness in those twenty years, but it seems like it’s never for very long.

I have so much that I want to do with my life and I just never can do it. I feel like this funk I have, this depression, this anxiety, it always holds me back.  Sometimes I feel like I’ve been given the short end of the stick since I was born by everything that’s happened.

I was doing good until this summer and it’s all coming back and I can’t stop it.

I used to write to make myself happy, to get out of my head. Those days are all over

I just want to be happy again.

Sorry if this post is depression and not my normal peppy self, fangirling about something. I just… yeah. Not me right now. I need a change.

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